Sick Nurses ( 2007)

                                       

 I’m warning you from the get go, I’m spoiling the living hell out of this. Now that said, I still think you should tag along for the journey, since the movie isn’t anything worth writing home about, and the spoilers ain’t worth that much.

Sick Nurses is the Thailand story of Dr. Tar, a nice young doctor with a great career and bright future ahead of him. Not to mention great money on the side selling bodies on the side.  He also has seven beautiful nurses who help with this. He’s engaged to Tahwaan, the beautiful ( I shudder as I write that), nurse who only talks about how they’re getting married. Tahwaan catches Dr. Tar cheating with her much hotter sister, Nook, or as I’ll be calling her from now one, Nookie. This leads Tahwaan to threaten to call the police, and gets her killed by all the other nurses and Dr. Tar, who keeps the body in his car to sell.

Seven days later, the day of Dr. Tar winning doctor of the year, Tahwaan comes back as a terrible looking actor-effects combo. The ghost of Tahwaan spends the rest of the movie killing off all of the nurses in some of the most bizarre death scenes I’ve ever seen.  We got toothbrush kills, we have a girl eating razors, so that he lower jaw falls off, then a plastic duck, or turkey I’m not sure, being rammed down her throat. There’s even a girl who gets a purse stitched to her neck, with her head inside, in such a way that when the stitching is undone, her head falls off. Their just so fucking odd, it’s not fun to watch, yet you can’t look away.

As it turns out, every nurse had her own obsession or vice, and one of the twists in the movie, is how Dr. Tar encouraged them all. These obsessions also determine how each nurse will be haunted and killed. I like the idea of characters who are flawed and controlled by their obsessions, but this isn’t the way they should be done, there’s not enough substance.

Now, I’m about to spoil the biggest twist of all, if you still think you might care to watch the movie for it’s story, I suggest you stop reading.  But if your interested in what I think is the greatest bad twist of all time, here we are.

Turns out, when the doctor was younger, he was very close to a male friend. I mean very close. While the movie doesn’t show anything to risky, there is a very important flashback. It involves the doctors male friend asking him to get married, to which the good doctor responds ” I can’t marry a man”. Turns out, he really wanted to get married, wanted to enough in fact to get a sex change, and come back in the doctors life as Tahwaan.  ….WOW, that’s dedication folks. The movie ends with him being birthed out of his sister ( a man again), as Dr. Tar watches. Still covered in blood and after birth Tahwaan slides up on Dr. Tar and say’s “Marry Me”, and it goes to black.

Well there you have it, Sick Nurses. I was really looking forward to watching this, I hadn’t heard anything on it, but it’s from Thailand, and I love watching foreign horror. I don’t know if it’s because I don’t get it, or because it really was as bad as I thought. I’d love to hear your thoughts on it, or what other foreign horror movie’s really let you down.

Score – 40%
Gore – 8/10